Thursday, December 31, 2009

December 31, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

The understanding that everyday is a new beginning.

The recovering drug addicts and alcoholics that show me that life is so good.

There really isn't anything like a good cup of coffee in the morning.

Another year is passing and my feet are on the ground, not under it.

Thank you God for giving me a New Year to grow and experience life in the most joyful way I can. Thank you for providing for me and everyone I come in contact as well as the whole planet with what they need to make 2010 a positive year in everyone's life.

Love and Peace to all.

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

December 30, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

The sudden realization that when I asked for help it came to me.

Being there for someone in need. And even with all my own personal issues I am still an example that things can be good.

The love of my family who thankfully understand me.

The unconditional love of my dog Ina. Thank God sweetness comes in all sizes and shapes.

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

December 29, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

Listening to my body and knowing when it's telling me it's time to rest and I do it.

Waking up drug and alcohol free, even when life is not so joyous. I am so glad that I don't pray to the drug and alcohol gods to get me through anymore.

Being recovered for nearly 16 months and finally getting to step 2.

Watching a movie on the sofa with my son, only to wake up with his head on my chest and him deeply asleep. It brought back the memories of when he was a little baby sleeping on me.

Life's good.

Monday, December 28, 2009

December 28, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

Being open minded and continuing on my path even when I can't see what is up ahead.

Learning to let go to a power greater than myself. That is a big one for me. I evidently like to be the victim and I like to wallow in it. Sitting back and letting the day go as it will which means I can't control it. Yikes.

Knowing God has many alias'.

The recovered drunks and drug addicts that help me everyday. Even the ones that aren't recovered help me. They show me I don't want that life anymore.

Sunday, December 27, 2009

December 27, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

Family time together.

Trying to give up and let it go evening when I have a hard time doing it. Having faith.

Friends both in and out of the program.


Saturday, December 26, 2009

December 26, 3009

Today I am grateful for:

Waking up to a warm house. Yesterday it was 51 degrees because the furnace stopped working.

Yesterday's friends and family gathering for the holidays.

Being sober and drug free through the holidays.

Learning by example from my son.

Thursday, December 24, 2009

December 24, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

Another decent night of sleep. Not waking up is a wonderful thing.

Vacation time, away from work.

The excitement of Christmas Eve in Drew's heart.

The Joy of the holiday season.

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

December 23, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

Learning the power of prayer and meditation.

Being sober and present every day. Even when it hurts.

Being able to get up and walk after falling on my ass skating. I'm so glad I don't have a tail, it would hurt worse.


Tuesday, December 22, 2009

December 22, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

A sober, drug free life. Everyday I am so surprised to find life so entertaining.

Growing up with my son, seeing life through his eyes.

Being there to help.

Follow though.

Monday, December 21, 2009

December 21, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

The friends and fellowship that I have within the AA/Lambda community.

Being willing to take direction.

A little bit of effort makes the creativity start to simmer.

Drew's natural passion and excitement for live.

Sunday, December 20, 2009

December 20, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

Prayer and meditaion and learning the power behind them.

Reawakening the gifts that I have been given.

Beautiful sunny days.

Learning to listen.

Saturday, December 19, 2009

December 19, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

8 days free of work and a continuous happy mood.

Being sober, another day. Even in my worse days, I keep going and I am content about it.

The challenge of looking for a new path in life.

To be blessed with a child that is 9 years old who has waken up in a good, positive mood every day of his life except for maybe 3 days. It is a serious honor. I hear from other parents how awful their kids are in the morning sometimes. I have always felt he has a special light about him. When he was a baby and I would grocery shop with him, sometimes people would walk up to me and literally say that about him. Maybe he glows?

Blogging my gratitudes. I can see it is opening up something in me to write about other things.

Friday, December 18, 2009

December 18, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

The ability to make change. To making a decision to make plans and follow through.

For my sobriety when the reality of life can get me down and the thought of drugs and alcohol sometimes never enters my mind.

My daily meetings with my God of my understanding.

Thursday, December 17, 2009

December 17, 2009

Today, I am grateful for:

Hearing what I need to hear when I need to hear it.

That unlike a lot of people, I can get at least 5 to 10 hugs a day. That is one of the great gifts of AA that I truly love. How many people go days without a hug?

Enjoying time together with my family in the evening. We are a funny little trio.

Knowing I have talents that I haven't even tapped yet.

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

December 16, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

Realizing that when I'm sick that nothing through my whole body works right. The way I eat, the way I think, the way I emotionally feel throughout the day.

Being able to say words to someone without expectation of a response can help stop the chatter.

Being able to feel the joy of my son Drew singing Silent Night in Dutch a cappella in the bathroom to himself. He knew we could hear him, but he wanted to share the song he learned at school. He has such a beautiful voice.

The joy that little creature brings to me every single day. And that is what helps keep me sober everyday, because I owe it to me and him to have sober times together. After all, he's giving me the same thing.

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

December 15, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

Finally feeling better from this cold. Surprisingly enough, the fever is what felt like it ended it's stay.

Learning about the ego and how it can get in the way of my serenity. It takes over and can ruin my day with it's board of trustees.

Watching the excitement build in my son as the holidays get closer. He is so excited about the holidays. It's true it's driven by toys and gifts but there is something magical about his happiness.

The desire to make it one more day.

Monday, December 14, 2009

December 14, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

My willingness to stay sober and drug free no matter what goes on. One hour at a time.

My partner for always being positive and supportive.

Learning new lessons about life everyday.

Finally starting to get over my cold. I don't like to slow down and this one was slowing me down. I think the fever finally cooked it out of my body last night.

Sunday, December 13, 2009

December 13, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

Another day of being sober and realizing you can teach an old dog new tricks.

I can't stress this enough. Being there for someone when they need you. In and out of the program of AA. Just to be able to listen is sometimes all someone needs.

Joy - being able to see it and feel it.

Prayer and meditation. I am so grateful that I am practicing to put time aside to communicate and listen to my higher power.

As a side comment. I'm letting go of the negative, embarrassing feeling I allow myself to have when I tell people I pray. The right winged, conservative, religious zealots have turned communication with God, of my understanding, into something religious fanatics do. I get this feeling that it is a practice I should not be participating in because it is something conservatives do.
As I wrote this, I just got the lesson that it is because I separate them from me, using judgement. I forgot that they too are as much as part of God as I. In the bigger picture we are all connected.
I am also grateful that I am aware of judgement.

Saturday, December 12, 2009

December 12, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

The weekend to get sick. There is nothing more fun than a head cold.

The right to vote. As much as I always say I don't want to go vote, I still do it. May the best woman win!

The Nutcracker last night performed by 3 to 5 year olds at St. Stephen's. Kids are so funny and they don't even know they are.

My first two dogs Mozart and Shubert. They taught me how to be a good, loving parent to a human.

Friday, December 11, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

Friday - I was born on a Friday and I love that it's the end of the work week.

Dogs - My parents actually listened to me and went right out and got another dog after losing their dog Tink. They are now the proud parents of a chihuahua - Pomeranian mix 1 year old. My mother's attitude is much better. She needs to nurture something to keep her going.

Dreams about rehab - weird but I had a very good dream about some rehab. I truly enjoyed my experience and found how positive it can be. I wish everyone were so lucky as I was.

Friends who have alcohol and substance problems who are at least thinking they do want to quit someday. I will continue to be there and be an example of how good it can get. Even on my worst day, it is way better than before.

Thursday, December 10, 2009

December 10, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

Waking up without a headache. Seems like this is the season to have them all the time.

A job that I have flexibility in.

Knowing that there are people within my sober community that are thinking about me and notice when I am a little off.

The joy my son gets when I read to him at night.

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

December 9, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

A beautiful, fall, sunny day.

Another day of trying not to act out.

My sobriety and the users in my life to appreciate what I have.

My possible example to others.

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

December 8, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

The continued effort to communicate with my God of my understanding. Even when I feel like there isn't a receiving end.

Another day sober and drug free. Living minute to minute.

The desire to go to a meeting today.

That I have everything I need today.

Monday, December 7, 2009

December 7, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

A pretty good night sleep.

A positive outlook on life no matter what I really feel like.

The will to want to do for others.

The innocents of my son.

Sunday, December 6, 2009

November 6, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

Friends calling out of the blue and saying their in town and being willing to visit with them.

Art - I went to a really nice art show at the Jung Center about a dog named Jack. Jack was a recuse dog from a kill shelter.

Being able to comfort my mother and father after their dog died yesterday. He was more or less murdered by a vet who pulled his teeth and broke his jaw in two places.

Seeing how when I see myself as diferent, it's okay, because that makes me, me.

Tink 2000 - 2009

Saturday, December 5, 2009

December 5, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

A good night sleep. They come so few and far between, I do appreciate when I get them.

A Saturday with no real plans. I'm ready for Holiday shopping and getting the holiday decrations out of storage.

The ability to find humor in most everything.

The joy that my son Drew received from a simple snow storm.

Friday, December 4, 2009

December 4, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

Waking up at 2:30 am and instead of doing drugs I hit the kitchen and started baking.

Fortunate enough to be able to take the day off of work.

Seeing the excitement in Drew's eyes of the possibility of snow. He's so ready to build a fort and have a snowball fight with his friend Elliott.

The month of December because I want to believe that you do see people at their best. (It's a shame it doesn't stick through the whole year with some, but, progress, not perfection!)

Thursday, December 3, 2009

December 3, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

Being able to keep my mouth shut and know when I can use it.

Being there for a friend when she thinks she is as crazy as me but she's not.

Meditation and communication with the God of my understanding.

Radom text messages just when I need them.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

December 2, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

Realizing that if I didn't know what tall is I wouldn't be able to know what short is.

Seeing my own evolution.

How fortunate I am to have my own little family.

Realizing before it was too late that I did have a higher power and it wasn't me.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

December 1, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

An hour of exptra sleep today because my body isn't feeling up to snuff.

The funny things that come out of my son's mouth every waking moment of the day.

That I still have two parents alive at this point in my life

That I am slowly learning how to realize I can cope.

Monday, November 30, 2009

November 30, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

Quiet mornings - time to have to myself before the hussle of the day

Another day sober and healthy

Learning to listen to my God of my understanding and actually being able to hear it

Being able to be of service to anyone who needs it

Sunday, November 29, 2009

November 29, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

The joy of laughter over anger - This morning my son woke me and asked if he could go watch TV and open his Legos and I said yes. What the reality of it was, I bought him a Lego Advent Calendar and he totally opened it because he didn't understand the concept of Advent. One day at a time!

Getting rid of clothes to donate to charity. I got rid of 52 pairs of underswear and I still have plenty. It feels good to get rid of everything.

To be in Houston during the fall season. What a great time of year.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

November 28, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

Another great day of being sober. It's a great feeling to know I didn't do drugs before bed and I don't have to do them when I get up.

Having a 25 year relationship and seeing we can keep it going, no matter what.

The Super Nanny - because it shows me I am doing more than the right thing by my son and that I know how to treat him with respect in order to get it back.

Knowing that I can go anywhere and do anything by myself, stay sober and write about it in this blog.

Friday, November 27, 2009

November 27, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

My sobriety and being aware how much I am grateful that I am moving in the right direction

Knowing that I can spend quality time with my son wihtout feeling like I am trying to ditch him to do other things

A very understanding partner who knows me and still loves me

A spirtual life that I didn't know I was missing until I was lost

Thursday, November 26, 2009

November 26, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

15 months of sobriety that I didn't even see coming

Knowing that I am and have been provided for everyday

My immediate family

The ability to know right from wrong and continously choosing right

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

November 25, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

One more day of sobriety

Today is going to be an easy day

The ability to communicate

Learning to be peaceful

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

November 24, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

My employement
My sobriety
My family
My ability to learn in life
Thanksgiving being around the corner

Monday, November 23, 2009

November 23, 2009

Today I am grateful for:

My partner Ian
My son Drew
My sobriety
My awakening